Sunday, August 18, 2013

Monday, July 22, 2013

Oldies but Goldies

These are scans from slides I found at a flea market.  Fantastic!  I love the photographer friendly fire at the end and the rando Gandalf guy in the middle.  If anyone has old prints or slides they'd like scanned...its my favorite Sunday afternoon activity.  Beware, they may end up on-line.


Am I the only one looking for gun barrels coming out of their bras?

Monday, July 1, 2013

Wednesday, June 12, 2013

The View

The view from my kitchen sink.

Sunday, June 2, 2013

Good As Any, Better Than Many

So this week my grandmother had a heart attack.  She's fine, just a few stents and a weary soul.  My immediate reaction was to run to her but my insufficient funds and that pesky old work thing got in the way.

My grandparents have always been far.  We moved away when I was young and that distance has always been vast and difficult.  Grandma and I have a kindred spirit and I credit that mostly to her teaching my soul who to be.  Mary, grandma, had three little Lambs: Rick, my father, Larry and Daniel and they have all grown to be lions of men spreading her grace and love and fearlessness.  She is the epitome of what it is to be alive and full even in the most dire of circumstances.  In fifteen minutes she somehow manages to breathe all of this into me in my not-as-weekly-as-I'd-like-phone calls.

Her faith in the good in those she loves, in me, is unsurpassed.  At a time when I deserved no grace and no belief and no heart, my grandmother stood proudly by me reciting her moniker "Good as any, better than many."  My grandparents saved me in the most actual sense of the word.  Without them my life would not be in any way what it is.  I would not be the man that I am without them; hopefully a lion like my father and uncles before me.

My prayer is that I am a man deserving of their faith and graceful kindness, of their love.  I will say the things I need to say with a gentle, brave voice.  I will be confident in the things that I am and honest about the things that I am not.  I will hold my head high and carry on without ceasing as grandmother has done many times.  I will take the time to breathe, think and listen.  I will go on wandering walks and build rock bridges in streams that dont really need them.  I will show others the grace that has been shown me.  I will leap towards risk with wisdom close at hand.  I will not make time for nonsense, grandma never did.  I will trust my heart.  I will believe in dreams and be practical in their pursuit.  I will look for hope always.  I will stand firmly with my family no matter the cost.  I will love without fear or ask of anything in return.  My grandmother believed there is a lion inside Benjamin Lamb and to that end I will live fearless.

Mary Lamb, grandmother, I love you and hope to be the man that you see in me.

 Our annual family photo on the ski shop stairs.

 My brother and I with our walking sticks on some random adventure, just like grandma taught us.

 As you can all see, I've never been able to keep that thing in.

This restlessness inside of me
It knows that you're no stranger,
You're my gravity
My hands will adore you
Through all darkness, and aim
For I am wanting
I am needing you
To be here
I need you near
Inside the absence of fear.

Monday, May 27, 2013

Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Back To the Middle and Around Again

One of my biggest pet peeves is an abandoned website. You eagerly google someone seeking new work or relevant information and only find their last update was made in 2009 and was about some large change happening in their life that would eventually lead to the neglect of their audience. I always scoffed at these busybodies and their unawareness that a bored audience in the age of mobile updates and 4G powered apps will move on and forget you faster than twitter blows up when Justin Bieber makes an ass out of himself. You must maintain your audience. You must output regularly.

It has been more than 15 months since my last post and I am guilty of my own peeve. While my blog did not have a Gwen Paltrow worthy following, I was proud of the audience that I had and the appreciation they seemed to foster for my images and random, usually emotionally blubbery words that I left for them. As I reworked my website, my designer suggested shutting down the blog and I considered it for a time. Then I looked at the posts, my diary of discovery, and felt detached from something that I once had. I looked at the small journey I'd been on for the past few years and longed for the hunting and gathering of images and the exploration of self through pictures; I sought the encounter of others and generally beautiful things. I have missed everything my blog stood for.

The past year has been amazing as I've foraged into the world of the working photographer, efforting both my own work and the work of others at my "day job" which provides me with steady income and the ever evasive health insurance, two rarities for a creative. But I miss the roaming. I miss the unknown. I miss the discovery. I miss being inspired instead of conjuring inspiration out of me.

It's time to take the camera out without a plan of how I'm going to use it. It's time to take the camera with me everywhere I go. It's time to stop planning shoots and journey till I find something worth shooting. It's time to find my heart in my pictures again.

I am back.